We have all been broken hearted, and while we might think it is the end of the world at the moment it is not, nope, not by a long run. The moment you start to believe that your sole happiness lies within one person then that is when you need to have someone slap you into reality and guide you back to living life for your sake, not theirs.
One of my best friends is going through, I don’t know, his fourth or fifth emotional breakdown over the same daft, whorish girl. I am OVER IT. I can’t and won’t be part of this anymore, I can’t! It kills me for multiple reasons that would take more than 2,000 words to even begin to explain. But here I am to tell you that first off; if you do this to yourself over the same person more than two times then you are creating this situation all on your own and for one reason or another love feeling miserable, hurt, and immobile. But let ME HELP YOU. Here are some of the basic things that you need to do in order to avoid such ordeal for the second or third, or if you want to help your heart heal the first time (like you all should).
- Disengage from all Contact with them. You need to understand that any kind of communication with this person is going to make getting over them even harder than if you never had to see them again. This means; get their phone number off all phones, take them off your Facebook, twitter, e-mail, any and all forms of conversation whether they are direct or indirect should be avoided. Don’t give me the crap of you don’t plan on talking to them on Facebook and so you don’t have to delete them. You KNOW YOU ARE GOING TO STALK THEM! That news feed is EVIL, get rid of it. Period.
- Stop listening to the radio. I got this advice from a guy at work, and you know what? He is absolutely right! What happens when that song you guys listened to comes up on the radio, the song you both listened to over a trip to the beach, or whatever?? You curl into a ball and cry. You don’t need that, your face doesn’t need that (or do you want more wrinkles??).
- Get a new hobby or finish that ongoing project. You are going to think about this person a lot, well, in the beginning at least, so everytime you do, start doing something else; knit, finish the patio you started, clean and organize your papers and bills (that in itself will be rewarding anyways), learn to play an instrument. The point is do something. Idle time is the devil’s workshop, and the devil is your ex.
- No drinking alcohol, it is your enemy; it makes you weak and vulnerable. Do you want to call her/him crying? Do you want to lose all respectability? No? Okay, great, tell vodka to take a vacation, you’ll see them at a happier time.
- If you REALLY need a drink (and this is like, and emergency) get a friend. Things can go terribly wrong if you don’t have a buddy… trust me, furniture can be ruined.
- Take a shower daily, put on deodorant, and dress to kill. I know you wont feel like it, but it is imperative that you look great. Why? Because if you look like shit, you feel like shit. Dressing and smelling good will eventually seep into you and hey, you might catch the attention of someone who will in turn give you that rebound you need (don’t sleep with them, but a rebound flirt, a feel good moment).
- DON’T DO IT AGAIN! You broke up for a reason, whether it was your idea or not, it wasn’t working. It takes two, and you two were not meant for one another. This is great, now you know, and you need to understand that you HAVE to move on (unless you want to live a stunted life, in that case, please disregard all of this golden advice).
I love my friend. I hope he sees that, and moves on with his life, because the truth is he’s great. He deserves someone who didn’t have their vagina up and down a pole.
Have a great weekend!